I first read “the horses do persist, but so do i” but that’s silly because horses aren’t even real

I’m livin’ someone’s dream, but it sure ain’t mine…

NGL aspects of my current life were merely dreams to me a decade ago.

The novelty of having running water on tap will never get old to me, or having a hot shower whenever I want, or a fridge to keep food in.

Of course there’s also aspects that make me feel like I’m living in the horror of how things could be. I find myself waking sometimes wishing to have what I had then, even if it meant losing everything I have now.

Letting my reality be wiped away like the sleep from my eyes just to be back then to have what I lost.

But of course even those years back then (and before) weren’t great. In fact many of them were so terrible that to this day (at over 30) I keep a small light in my room so that when the PTSD kicks into over drive in the night I can quickly figure out where I am to quickly ground myself in reality.

The horrors persist, but so do I. For how can I can the jewels of life unless I continue the search?

The horrors are like a Dark Souls boss.

I only need to defeat them once to progress, but they can never keep me from trying over and over again no matter how many times I die.

Living the dream, I expect to wake up any second.