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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Defiant-Evening540 on 2023-09-05 11:19:38.
My parents are divorced and I (16f) used to bounce between my mom and dad’s every other week. But since last year I stay more with my mom than with my dad. Dad’s remarried and mom isn’t. My stepmom and dad have 3 kids together (8, 6 and 4). My dad’s house has more money and they go on more vacations than my mom can afford. This year my mom was able to get money for us to go on vacation but it overlapped with my dad’s Disney booking. I wanted to go on vacation with mom and I told dad that mom and I already had the plans. He said it was the first Disney vacation and he figured I wouldn’t want to miss out on my half siblings experiencing it for the first time, But this was the first vacation mom and I were able to do since I was 9.
It’s been over a month since the vacations and in the last week or thereabouts my dad and stepmom went from disappointed but sorta understanding to mad that mom didn’t sacrifice the vacation with me so I could enjoy seeing my siblings experience Disney for the first time. They said they were sorry my mom denied me the opportunity to enjoy the amazing moment. I told them they were getting a bit carried away over it all and it wasn’t a big deal. They said given how important my siblings are to me it was a huge deal to make me miss out on those memories and experiences with them.
I told them I did not care about being there for their first time at Disney. I said I never cared about seeing their first vacation, etc. That they care as their parents but they are not such a huge deal in my life that I am feeling denied milestones for them. This came as a shock to them and they said as their much older sister and I told them I might be older, but I would rather have memories with mom than them.
My dad and stepmom did not handle what I said well and maybe I was wrong. They told me my half siblings adore me and they believe I think the world of them too. The fact I admit to not feeling that way and not caring is a cruel thing. They also accused me of leading everyone on.
AITA?
Nah. You’re not.
The trip with your mom feels more special than the trip to Disney would’ve. It’s Disney, not a fucking first communion or something.
NTA
NTA. Perhaps not the best response, but in the end you chose what trip you wanted to go on the most. Everyone will have a good time, and hopefully there will be other opportunities.
