• 1 Post
  • 279 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: June 13th, 2023

help-circle
















  • That’s funny. I’m a tax accountant. Until now I would’ve guessed my industry had some of the most malignant socially incompetent people but I’m clearly wrong. And come to think of it, even the worst most closed off unapproachable people I’ve ever worked with have always been excited to talk about their work, like it’s the one thing they’re comfortable going on about. I’m not asking for a beer at tchotchkes (I too maintain space from colleagues because of the conflict of interest with work in between).

    Again, stay the fuck at home, I’ve never encountered such toxic loathing for any kind of human interaction before, I wouldn’t want you in the office with that kind of attitude. Congrats, Dobby is free, you never have to wear pants or look presentable again.



  • Right, so you can choose an outfit and figure out what kind of soda to offer, whether to use iambic pentameter or perhaps haiku, etc. you mentioned that.

    Here’s how it could go:

    Steve: Hey Bob, I just heard you’re working on a flux capacitor. That’s really cool, I’m more of a warp core guy but I read an article on the holonet about that last week. How’s that project going?

    Bob: It’s real tough, we gotta feed this 1.21 giga watts of electricity so I’m working on a Tesla coil to power it.

    Steve: Oh no way, you know, I actually just built one last month on another project, I’ve never worked on a flux capacitor before but I can help you with the Tesla coil if you want.

    Bob: Oh yeah sure thanks that’s real helpful. I’m just getting started so it’s still in planning phases but I’ll come grab you in a bit.

    Steve: Awesome! Mind if I watch you work a bit? I’ll stay out of your way since I can’t add much value, I just like watching people who are good at what they do while they practice their craft. And it’ll help me if I ever encounter this in the future

    Bob: Oh you know actually I’m sorta uncomfortable with that, makes me feel on the spot. How about I show you when it’s done? I’m happy to go over the designs and final product and stuff when I have something to show for it.

    Steve: Sure great awesome that works! Doesn’t have to be anything formal, just a quick rundown of the basics and maybe how you resolved some technical issues with creative workarounds, stuff like that. You can wear whatever you want, don’t need to dress up fancy for me. You don’t have to feed me or offer drinks or anything either, super chill, just a few minutes to skim over your work.

    Bob: Cool man, that works, any time. By the way, how’s that warp nacelle coming alone? I hear the Heisenberg compensator is acting up again.

    Steve: Yeah it’s being a little bitch but I’ll show you once it’s done. Everyone wins!

    See that’s how it could go if you weren’t a toxic antisocial insane person. Just talk to colleagues about projects, learn, share, collaborate. But instead you drop thousands of words of toxic vitriol overthinking the shit out of it. Going from shooting the breeze with colleagues to planning month long lesson plans and Ted talks down to what outfit you’re gonna where, what accent to use (?), something about perfume…seriously man, get thee to a therapist and eat a Xanax, please l. You’re in dire need.


  • Learning by osmosis

    So what is the link between osmosis and delegation? It’s very simple. Take your busiest employee and — assuming you hired smart people — physically put this superstar with one to two team members who are intelligent but possess minimum skills to complete a task or their job. I’ve seen that at the end of one day, the employees who started with few skills will have learned something new that they can likely do again independently. The idea is dependent on your employees being motivated to try, rather than sitting and watching someone work while they create no additional value.

    I guess that definitely rules you out! Hope you know everything because with your attitude idk how you can possibly build professional relationships. I know there’s toxic people online but goddamn you’re one of the worst I’ve ever encountered. I’m done here, just wanted to point out the technical value of, you know, not being a fucking asshole to colleagues by calling them friggin vampires.