It seems that every community takes anything said about gender dysphoria that isn’t calling it great and beautiful and awesome, as transphobia, and the mods delete comments.
I’m wondering if there is a community for people dealing with dysphoric children that don’t get offended if something is said in honest questioning and honest debate, that doesn’t toe the politically correct line?
It’s impossible to find real help online because everyone wants to make it political. It may be political in the macro, but the micro isn’t political, and there should be room for all opinions and debate, especially when the goal is to help the person afflicted and the family to grow and be healthy in their relationships.
Here’s a good resource: http://genderdysphoria.fyi/
You need to understand how often people ask questions that seem to come from a place of ignorance but genuine curiosity and then take that discussion to tell trans folks that they are wrong. It happens so much that it’s the main way that transphobes try to infiltrate spaces meant for trans folks.
My honest response is to check that website out. If you are asking about this in trans spaces, bring zero opinions to the table and accept what is said back to you without debate. Debating trans folks’ existence is something that is forced upon them in their own spaces by malicious people asking and framing questions just like you’ve described.
It’s hard to take the “enlightened centrism” stance seriously when I see it used as an excuse. So many centrists tell trans folks that their identity is wrong and that they are mentally ill or chose this “lifestyle”. As if they want to be trans. As if they like feeling scared and being told they’re wrong about something as fundamental as their identity.
I’m trying to find people to talk to. I’m not trying to push any opinion or agenda. My child is having issues. I don’t believe that just affirming them will solve their deep rooted problems, but I’m willing to have a back and forth with people who have had both success and failure with that approach. I want a place where I can speak honesty and not have people start calling me dishonest or saying I have some agenda or I’m trying to push some kind of politics.
I guess I’m looking for a sort of Alanon type environment, where people can share their experiences without judgement. I don’t mind if someone says they think I’m wrong and are willing to share their experience to back up their statement. I actually would welcome it.
If I were looking for confirmation bias, then that would be easy. What I’m looking for is a real and honest discussion with people who have dealt with this issue, both personally and professionally.
Honestly, you may find talking with a therapist or taking a psych class to be more helpful. Either should be able to put you in touch with RL groups that are open to discussion and information exchange.